Hidden Redundancies

When we’re writing, we’re in creative mode. There are some things we just aren’t aware of, which is why we have beta readers, a professional proofreader, or a copy editor review our material when we‘re finished. One thing you want to look for in our writing is redundant terms. Here are some examples:

10 AM in the morning: 10 AM says it all, folks, unless there is a parallel universe where we have 10 AM in the evening. I’ve yet to go there.

The reason why: The reason is good enough. You don’t need the word why.

The end result: The result is sufficient. No need for “and” or “final.” As opposed to what? The semifinal result? The final, final, final result? Something that occurred after the end result? No, you are good with, “The result was great.”

My past experience: All experience has taken place in the past. I don’t even like the term “lived experience,” although I recognize it has ideological connotations and is frequently used for emphasis. But if you’re writing generally, without emphasis, you can simply say, “my experience.”

Close proximity: Merriam-Webster dictionary defines proximity as closeness. So, you are saying the same thing twice. You could easily say, “He lived in proximity to the grocery store.” Most people clarify with close, but it’s really unnecessary.

 

 

It Was a Little Bit Heartbreaking

 I always cringe when I see a sentence like that: “I was slightly devastated. It was sort of horrible. It was a little bit heartbreaking.” No, no, no.

As writers, one of our main goals is to be clear. Those are confusing sentences. Let’s take the subject title about heartbreaking. If something is truly heartbreaking, you feel emotionally ruined. Usually, we are talking about a death or a serious loss when we talk about something heartbreaking. But by putting the phrase “a little bit” in front of heartbreaking, we diminish it completely. The reader has no idea what you are saying. If you were a little bit heartbroken, does that mean that you were simply sad for a couple of hours? Or were you indeed devastated? If that was the case, just say devastated. You don’t need a phrase before it that will diminish its meaning.

Likewise, if you only felt a bit sad, there’s no reason to use a strong term like devastating, heartbreaking, or horrible. Just say sad. “I felt sad. I felt upset.” You can say, “I felt a bit upset,” but once again, be careful using diminutives. Be clear. The solution to this confusion is to write those sentences in one of two ways, depending on what you’re trying to say:

“I was devastated” or “I was sad.” It’s an easy fix.

This also happens with terms like sort out and kind of. They seem to be very popular now on public radio, NPR, or even in progressive circles. It’s the same thing if you say, “I was kind of a wreck.” No, either you were a wreck, or you were slightly off balance. Choose one, and make sure that your writing clearly expresses the emotion that you want to convey.